Let’s be honest about the Muppets

swedish_chef

Now I have yet to see the new Muppet Movie, but I know lipstick on a pig when I see it, (sorry Miss Piggy!) and the Muppets are pushing a left-wing agenda.

The Muppet Show (1976-1981) is a perfect example of this hatred of capitalism. For instance, do we ever see any Muppets paid for a hard day’s work?

Also, day in day out, they parade around with Hollywood Liberal elites like Peter Sellers, Rich Little, Jason Segal and others. Is their anything these despicable Muppets won’t do to indoctrinate children to the liberal agenda??

They even appear to live in an egalitarian society; these communal hand-puppets live in harmony between the sexes! Females and the males are equals – just look at how Miss Piggy pushes and controls her man Kermie. How disturbing! When will liberals stop indoctrinating our children?

On a Fox Business News show recently the topic of the Muppets communist agenda was discussed in the segment Follow the Money with host Eric Bolling and Dan Gainor of the Media Research Center, who went after the latest Muppets Movie, especially the new villainous character Tex Richman:

Fox speaks the truth when they tell us that the Muppets are attempting to influence our children with a green, (sorry Kermit!) anti-capitalist agenda. Much in the same way, say Mcdonald’s attempts to win children over through cheap toys; pure mind control! But of course when Mcdonald’s does it, it’s for lofty American goals like selling unhealthy products to children!

Controlling what out children see is of the greatest importance. Of course, like most Fox programs, that doesn’t mean curbing violence, especially the kind of unnecessary brutal force one can expect from law enforcement officers a la Cops. This is extremely important for childhood development. On the other hand, any kissing, sexuality or anything else remotely nurturing (i.e. Sesame Street) is just idealist sissy communism; it is just plain wrong! How can we expect our children to grow up with American dreams by teaching them that making money by plundering is wrong? That greed is wrong? If we continue down this path we will make our children weak with cooperative socialist ideals. This must be stopped!

If it wasn’t for Fox’s Business Network none of these details would have been brought to our attention. So we ought to be very grateful for their “fair and balanced” news team.

Now let’s be honest about the suspicious egalitarian fair-trade loving, big bank hating, communistic characters in the Muppets and salut Fox news for enlightening the world on this topic. Because of its tireless effort to push for pure “laisser-faire” non-regulated capitalism that gave us the opportunity to bailout the sky-scraping banks and juggernaut insurance companies I will call the next segment: Muppet Pinheads and Muppet Patriots!

Pinheads

Gonzo is perhaps the sickest, most twisted Muppet of them all. One whose subversive activity would have never survived the McCarthyism or Golden Age America:

“Tells us , Mr. Gonzo, are you, or have you ever been a card carrying member of the Communist Party?”

Not only is he, but this pervert Muppet lives with a harem chickens in a polyamourous relationship! How deviant!

The Swedish Chef: He is from Sweden, the most god-less European country of all. And I can’t understand a word he is saying! Sworty flourty borky?Shut up commie scum!

Patriots:

Sam The Eagle. Sam is a great American patriot, who represents the values of the American way. One day he will be a great host for a Fox News program.

http://youtu.be/iCVmKN5At_o

Mrs. Piggy: She like clothes and shopping, and although she can be at times irreverently and bossy towards her man, Kermit, her unrelenting consumerism represents the best of humanity..um..I mean pig kind: Consumerism!

And how can we forget true American patriots like the guys who worked for John McCain’s 2008 presidential campaign, I am of course talking about Statler and Waldorf. These old curmudgeons on the balcony rows point out all the flaws and help us see the hypocrisy in the Muppet show. And because they are higher up, they are better than all the other characters in the show! They teach children the value of vantage point: the higher you are in life the more mocking and inconsiderate you can be.

Communist Gonzo courtesy of Holytaco.com

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