Tales from the Crotch: A Halloween Burlesque Play Produced in 24 Hours

tales from the crotch

It’s been three years since Glam Gam took to the stage on Halloween, a holiday that is perfectly suited to our special brand of ridiculous burlesque. It was in that show that I made my solo debut as Jizzika Unklean, birthing an alien baby to Ace of Base and devouring it onstage while painted green from head to toe. This year we’re reaching back into the freakiest parts of our twisted souls for Tales from the Crotch, a 24 Hour Halloween Cabaret that will put a smutty spin on the beloved Tales from the Crypt franchise.

Let’s clear one thing up first: it’s not a play that’s 24 hours long. We do like singing, dancing and taking our clothes off, but even we need to sleep sometimes. Rather, it’s a production that is cast, rehearsed and staged, all in 24 short hours. In order to pull off such a feat, we’re seeking vampires, serial killers, demons, witches, mummies…. Oh wait, I mean actors, singers, dancers, theatre geeks, circus freaks, burlesque performers, musicians, artists, set builders, costume wizards – you name it. We want you! Come to Café Cleopatre at 9pm on Wednesday, October 30th to pick your role, get your script and start rehearsing.

Maybe you haven’t been on stage since appearing as Tony in a high school production of West Side Story the better part of a decade ago. Or perhaps you’d be popping your stage cherry, gracing the worn floorboards and facing a live audience for the first time. You’ve always been a bit of an exhibitionist, now it’s time to explore. If the stage isn’t really your thing, you could always just lend a hand with props or costumes and watch the actors sweat down to their skivvies from the trap door.

We’ve broken the roles down to three categories: Luscious Lead (*may require full or partial nudity), Scantily Clad Chorus, or a Camel Toe Cameo. Our call is open to professionals and amateurs alike, all roles are up for grabs. Be forewarned though: you could have to sing, you might dare to dance, but above all else, you must be prepared to be ridiculous.

And as completely insane as it sounds, ready or not, the curtains will be drawn 24 hours later and a play will be performed. For more information or to fill out a registration form, visit Glamgam.com… actually you should probably check it out anyway because there are lots of sexy pictures of past shows.

Finally, please cum and check out the show on Halloween night, Thursday October 31st at Café Cleopatre (1230 St. Laurent). Doors open at 9 and the show starts at 10 sharp. It’ll cost you a mere $10 to witness the spectacle, or $15 if you dare to come uncostumed… but who goes out on Halloween without a costume? This show is a fundraiser for our 2014 Montreal Fringe play. Will we succeed in pulling off this seemingly insane undertaking? Or will we fall flat on our naked butts??   Either way, it’s entertainment!

You can find out more on the show’s Facebook page

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